


The crap branch says

by Whiplash_thunderstorm



Category: Trolls (Movies 2016 2020)
Genre: Comedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-13
Updated: 2021-03-13
Packaged: 2021-03-21 18:21:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 602
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30025938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Whiplash_thunderstorm/pseuds/Whiplash_thunderstorm
Comments: 1
Kudos: 6





	1. Chapter 1

Branch: Jesus it's cold as hell yet im still having a melt down. 

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Creek: If you don't like me at my worst than you don't like me at my best!~

Branch:......

Poppy: So tr-!

Branch: Bitch I never liked you at all.

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Poppy: Branch go to bed your gonna hate yourself in the morning!

Branch: jokes on you Imma hate myself regardless~

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Creek: He kicked me in the face!

Poppy: why did you kick him?

Branch: he said What are those....and I gave him a closer look~

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Branch: why are you filming me?

Poppy: I'm filming a crime! You are eating an entire cake by yourself! Do you realize how despicable you are?

Branch: Yes can I eat my feelings in peace?

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Branch: Damn I don't need eye's to sense scum....

(Creek casually walks by)

Branch: Your disgusting!

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Poppy: Rise and Shine my beauties!

Branch: welp guess I can sleep in.

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Branch to poppy

Branch: How can I play hard to get when im Hard to want?

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	2. Round 2

Branch: I like my coffee like my women...strong hot and black.

Quincy: he's invited to the cookout.

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Poppy to Branch

Poppy: how are you bisexual yet single? Bruh yo "bi yo self'

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Branch: if you want to be the sun in my life you can start by being 93 million miles away from me.

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Branch: why do you have a fake ID?

Poppy: you have to be 18 to hold the puppies....

Branch: you an adult you can simply ask.... Why you trying to hold a puppy if you can't even hold an idea?

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(Branch out in the woods lat at night.)

Branch: dig a grave~ Dig a grave~ creek ain't going to that rave~ If he plans to that's not Brave~

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Creek: I ate the last of Branch's snacks how long do I have to live?

Poppy: 10

Creek: 10....what?

Branch: 9...

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Creek: Namaste Branch..

Branch: Namaste the frick away from me and my sticks!

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Poppy: Branch the pods on fire!

Branch: I know....

Poppy:......arent you gonna do something?

Branch: What do ya mean? i started it I did something.

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Poppy: Black lives matter!

Creek: all lives matter!

Branch: .....no lives matter.

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Branch: Im not just going to hell..... imma be the next Satan...

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Branch: I feel like a prince today!

Hater: you wish

Branch: your right im a ducking king bitch! Haha!


	3. Hee hee

Branch: The best part of waking up in the morning is...... Yelling WHAT THE FUC-!

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Branch: jumping out of bed and there already bitching! Man i really hate existing as I try to come ta life~

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Branch: Drink me some bleach boys and YEET ma soul I wanna get tossed in a f*cking whole and drift away~

Hickory: ........ Branch you okay buddy?

Dickory: no...no he has a point.

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Cloud guy: You cant kill me you love me to much!

Branch:...........

Poppy: Branch.....

Branch: some one is going to die tonight~!

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Branch: Im sorry im from the slap a b*tch tribe!

(Proceeds to then slap creek!

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(Branch calmly driving with the rock trolls in the car.)

Branch: I just realized I have complete controll of how our life goes right now...

Barb: 👀........

Riff: what did he say?.....

Val: bud do you mind if i drive the rest of the way?

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Branch: *spits out water

Synth: Dude what's wrong?

Branch: It's dry as hell!

Synth:.............what?

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(Branch learns that Dante is Christian)

Branch:*nose bleeds* oye Dante!

Dante: *turns* Yes?

Branch: *rolls his eye's into his head* HAIL SATAN!

(Branch then proceeds to then flop onto the floor shaking screaming as Dante is crying in fear.)

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End file.
